Stepping out to perform in front of 80,000 people only to realize that your voice has disappeared is the kind of stress dream you have before a big work presentation. However, for Abel Tesfaye, also known as the Weeknd, this nightmare became a reality at Los Angeles‘ SoFi Stadium in 2022. „I rushed backstage to find my vocal coach: I can’t sing, it’s not coming out,“ he recalls. „Later on, I discovered that I was having a panic attack. It wasn’t a physical injury; it was more mental than physical.“
The concert had to be canceled and rescheduled, marking the end of a US stadium tour for Tesfaye, who was also finishing up his TV series, The Idol. Juggling production for the show and his tour, Tesfaye began experiencing sleep paralysis.
The closing scenes of The Idol were filmed at SoFi Stadium the night before Tesfaye lost his voice, where he portrayed the character Tedros. After performing a full Weeknd concert, he returned to film for four more hours as Tedros. The exhaustion of overworking finally caught up with him. „Anytime something happened in my life, I could always escape on stage. This was the first time I couldn’t just escape,“ he explains. „My body was telling me to figure it out.“
The experience of losing his voice inspired Tesfaye to co-write a psychological thriller, Hurry Up Tomorrow, directed by Trey Edward Shults. The film explores a battle between Tesfaye’s ego and unconscious, filled with suspenseful moments and intense scenes.
After a successful 15-year career as one of the world’s biggest pop stars, Tesfaye sees the film as a conclusion to The Weeknd project. „I feel grateful that I get to film my persona on 35mm, and light it on fire,“ he reflects. „Because at a certain point, you don’t want to be defined by something you started at 19 years old.“
Now 35, Tesfaye reflects on his journey from dropping out of high school to becoming a music sensation. His early gigs led to a realization that pushed him to work harder and hone his craft. Over the years, his music has explored themes of narcotics, trauma, and sex, reflecting his personal experiences and emotions.
While his early songwriting may have focused on negative and transactional aspects of sex and relationships, Tesfaye’s philanthropic work and his deep connection to his family show a different side of him. Despite the complexities in his music and persona, Tesfaye remains focused on creating art that pushes boundaries and evokes strong emotions.
The contrast between the soulful Tesfaye and the nihilistic Weeknd is a central theme in his work, but Tesfaye prefers not to overanalyze it, stating that it applies to all artists. His experiences with drugs and alcohol have influenced his music, enhancing the creative process but also leading to moments of reflection.
„You need to be under the influence to fully experience this!“ He used alcohol as a crutch to combat nerves and perform on stage, admitting that he had no formal training or mentorship in singing. He emphasized the importance of practice and learning from failure, even though it wasn’t enjoyable. His mixtapes gained popularity in the underground scene, but it was his second album, Beauty Behind the Madness, in 2015 that propelled him into the mainstream with hits like Can’t Feel My Face and The Hills. Despite the success, he felt the pressure to surpass it with each subsequent project, leading to the creation of his album Starboy and EP My Dear Melancholy.
As his career continued to flourish with the release of After Hours, he found success but also faced criticism and pressure to outdo himself. His foray into acting in the HBO series The Idol was met with challenges and setbacks, ultimately resulting in mixed reviews and disappointment. Reflecting on the experience, he acknowledged the difficulties and complexities of the entertainment industry, highlighting the importance of staying true to oneself and not succumbing to external pressures. I believe the world is too enigmatic to make definitive statements, but there is a sense of something lurking beneath the surface. Our instincts may be a form of divine guidance, warning us when things are not right. Ignoring these instincts can have serious consequences, almost like blasphemy. With the project Idol, we knew deep down that something was off, but we pushed forward in the hopes of success. Looking back, it felt wrong from the beginning – too many people involved, too many opinions.
Despite feeling like filmmaking was a form of torment at one point, working on Hurry Up Tomorrow brought back the joy for the director, Shults, and provided catharsis for all involved. The scene on the private jet, where Tesfaye’s emotional seams are unraveling after a breakup, symbolized feelings of abandonment that many can relate to.
Tesfaye’s personal experiences with abandonment, including his absent father, influenced his music and creative process. He believes that forgiveness is essential, and he underwent a healing process before opening up about his past in the film. Trusting someone like Trey to expose his vulnerabilities was a new experience, almost like a therapeutic session for them all.
The album Hurry Up Tomorrow reflects on past traumas and personal growth, with some songs touching on familiar themes while others show a more relaxed side of Tesfaye. He acknowledges that while his fans may expect debauchery from him, he wants to evolve and age gracefully as an artist.
Although he hints at the possibility of retiring the Weeknd persona, he emphasizes the importance of continuing to dream and evolve creatively. He sees a need to explore his heritage and reconnect with his roots in Ethiopia, which may involve addressing his feelings towards his father. Despite his mother’s positive influence, he acknowledges the impact of not having a father figure in his early years.
The absence of a father figure is a difficult topic to articulate, but Tesfaye finds solace in expressing his emotions through his music. The song „Hurry Up Tomorrow“ serves as a confession to God about his struggles with abandonment and a desire for redemption. Reflecting on his journey, he realizes that success alone cannot fill the void in his life – true fulfillment comes from meaningful connections and self-care. „Schlaf ist so eine süße Sache, nicht wahr?“
Hurry Up Tomorrow ist jetzt in Kinos. The Weeknd spielt in Ford Field, Detroit, am 24. und 25. Mai und tourt dann durch Nordamerika
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